We had one of those – marvelous, write home about, all went well, creative, instructive, wonderful days yesterday home learning, enjoying the family, creating great meals, the flow of it all – and yet, I had a couple of ah-ha moments about homeschool frustration.

My most frustrating times with homeschooling were started in kindergarten and lasted  first –3rd grade with my eldest son. Stocked full of ideas, phonics programs, a school-like area in our home, encouragement, internet chat rooms and IRL mentors,  I was full of the joy and anticipation of watching this little being bloom into everything the “claims of great homeschoolers” had fed me.

We spent hours – HOURS – working on phonics, and I mean starting with the first 26 – the Alphabet. A triumphant day is when he remembered a letter from the day before. We struggled the entire first year, tying any method I could discover, to learn those letters – and the numbers as well.  In June – we had a huge family gathering and presented him with a certificate and plaque of his achievements, and even in the displaying of his great learning – he forgot the L when reciting the alphabet, sometimes still does.

This tired learning style and frustration paved the way for how we taught reading.  Tears would often flow. Sitting on the couch crunching out each individual sound of each individual word to Hop on Pop, or the clever stories of the First Reader, or Green Eggs and Ham.

Once we got the sounds going, and they made sense, it went easier, and he mastered all 72 phonograms.  He found no use for them, and would not use them to pull a word together to read aloud, but after 3 years of daily reminders, games, flash cards, writing and the like, he did learn them.  He could spell just about anything from thinking of the sounds, but could not read them on print.  More frustrations and crying. From Me.  He was just bewildered.

And then one day, like all those who have gone before had promised, He read. Fluently. With total comprehension. Somewhere around 9 and a half and ten.  Now he reads himself to sleep each night. He reads for information. He reads to discover cheats on the computer programs. He reads to learn how to fix things. He reads to chat with friends, he Reads to cook, to get directions, to order off of a menu, to get prices and product information. He reads.  In a day, 4 years of frustrations were wiped clean.  Gone, almost forgotten.

I see the 4-5 yr old tots who have the ability to soak in memorized information – spit it out – impress the friends – swell pride in the hearts of moms – and I smile. I think of all we learned together, my son and I, on how to communicate – how to learn – how to teach.  When the going gets tough for these homeschooling families later – will the stick to the plan? Stay on Path? Or will they raise their hands up in the I Can’t Do This frustration? Will they heed the advice so readily available that says that they shouldn’t be teaching older grades?  To those opinionated of such – I say. HA!  YOU HAVE NO IDEA! The struggle and challenges of getting, finding, discovering ways for a child with Audio Memory Deficiency to memorize simple things we take for granted.

Learning, it comes easily for him, always has. His interest and curiosity pull him though what might be great challenges to others.  We practically went through the entire Keepers of the Faith, Contenders of the Faith books during these years, he became a marksman shooter with the NRA program, he has learned to boat, do leather work, wood work, identify trees, birds, shells, rocks.  He can discern people’s motives better than I. See their hearts.  Its the memory of details, words that don’t make sense, words he doesn’t seem to think pertain to his joy.  He pushes them off, puts them in his back pack so to speak, knowing about them, but knowing he can ask me to pull them out at a moments need.

Which brings me to my ah-ha moment of today – which was in our current frustration point – Math. But the sun has peaked over the eastern hills, and is promising to shine on the glorious morning waves for a walk.  I’ll be back to share my ah-has. 🙂

What I didn’t realize at the time, was that he wasn’t a pre-disposed to love writing and reading little crafty girl, he was a wiggly little boy who would rather be in the forest than at a desk.